Public sentiments are characterized by deep sorrow, anger, and frustration over the humanitarian crisis in Gaza, with widespread calls for justice and compassion for the Palestinian people. Many commenters express feelings of helplessness regarding the actions of both Hamas and Israel, while criticizing the perceived inaction of the international community. This complex situation has led to a polarized discourse, with critics highlighting both humanitarian needs and political responsibilities.

Hamas

Israel

International Community

The problem isn’t whether or not you think there’s some government culpability. The problem is if you think there’s some sort of outsized government culpability for Israel compared to any other nation or government. 

I lived through the whole Iraq/Afghanistan war timeline. Sure there were some protestors here and there. But there weren’t music concerts being taken over by anti-American banners. Every time you went on a social media post people weren’t spamming American flags with the word “genocide” next to it. People weren’t constantly spamming “Free Iraq” or “Free Afghanistan.” 

And this is after over 1,000,000 million people were killed in the Iraq and Afghanistan campaigns. 

But this isn’t supposed to be a “whataboutism.” It’s a genuine question as to why it seems like nobody gives an absolute fuck about any other war or genocide or whatever but suddenly are hyper focused on this conflict to the minute detail. I can find you plenty of photos of dead Iraqi kids, but nobody cares. And that’s the problem.

ImportTuner808

I am pro Israel, but I’m also a mother, and it is hard to see a child or a baby suffering, no matter where they’re from. Yeah I want these babies to be fed. I also don’t want them to be raised to hate Jews. But an infant shouldn’t be held accountable for what happened in 2023.

Shomer_Effin_Shabbas

There are a lot of zionist Jews care deeply about Israel who are also extremely disturbed by the lack of food reaching Gaza. They are concerned about the actions of the current Israeli government over many things, not just the food distribution, but are able to critique with specificity and without hate (bc the goal is to make Israel better). You have to know where to look for nuanced, compassionate voices who are extremely familiar with Israeli politics. They are probably not going to be the loudest voices online because they don't say things for clickbait or allow for easy, comforting narratives. Some suggestions of social media:

Israeli Policy Forum has great information and analysis about all things related to Israel. 

@ politicaljew

@ holylandspeaks

@ that\_semite

@ alanalindsay

@ yehudimomrim

@ tylerthejewmaican

Dobbin44

I feel so strongly that Israel is critically important I get into shouting matches with strangers about it.

But also, Israel is fucking this up pretty badly right now. Saying war is hell isn't really an excuse. They have to understand the optics of the situation and take them into account, Hamas certainly is. Optics matter because right now the crap optics make us diaspora Jews less safe. That's real too.

NAF1138

It is totally sane, normal, and not at all contradictory to support Israel as a Jewish state *and also* condemn or criticize what the state is doing.

Hamas aside, Israel as the occupying entity has a legal and moral responsibility to ensure appropriate humanitarian assistance is available. The starvation is not fake, there are absolutely innocent civilians starving, even among the wealthier families in Gaza, because there simply is not enough food available to them. 

Don’t let anybody convince you that it’s inappropriate to feel disturbed by this crisis, or that if you’re disturbed you must adopt a host of other anti-Israel and antisemitic beliefs or else you are “complicit.” Fuck all of that. Check out Standing Together if you haven’t heard of them… there are “friends of” ST chapters all over North America in case that’s where you live.

Acrobatic-Parsnip-32

War is not pretty. 

Arab neighbors don’t do shit to help. 

Israel was attacked and is now responsible to feed them. 

Egypt’s border is sealed. 

It’s a whole crazy situation. 

Oh and yeah there’s still 50 hostages there. wtf.

Surround8600

Yes. It's enormously painful. It's as the Times of Israel put it: Hamas is ultimately responsible for this war, but Israel bears immediate responsibility too: [https://www.timesofisrael.com/how-israel-made-itself-responsible-for-gaza-and-for-all-the-death-and-destruction-there](https://www.timesofisrael.com/how-israel-made-itself-responsible-for-gaza-and-for-all-the-death-and-destruction-there) 

This doesn't mean we AS JEWS are morally responsible any more than other people are. But because it's the Jewish state doing this (and by "this" I mean "allowing a famine to continue instead of making every possible effort to alleviate it") it's giving a moral injury to all Jews.

tempuramores

[deleted]

This is something I've been struggling with myself. One of the things that turned me off of the progressive left (as a progressive leftist) was seeing how many of my friends ooh and ahh over my 2 year old but justified the murder of the Bibas boys. Kfir Bibas was 3 days older than my son, and my partner and I were considering Aliyah in 2022. My own friends might have been justifying the murder of my son, my partner, and myself.


I refuse to do the same thing to a Palestinian child, no matter the crimes of their government. No baby deserves to starve and to hand-wave away that starvation is a betrayal of every value I hold. 


It's not right or fair, but every government has to weigh the virtue of a proportional response (you can tell I watched too much West Wing as a kid). Clearly what's being tried *is* dismantling Hamas, but I don't believe one life can be traded for another--how many children are the Hamasniks worth? 


I support Israel defending itself, but how far is too far? I don't really have an answer.


EDIT: I don't have an answer but I do have a suggestion. The western powers can recognise a Palestinian state once all the hostages are returned AND the remainder of Hamas disbands/submits to the ICC for judgement for war crimes for October 7. Return the hostages, disband, do teshuva, and they get a state. The ball is in their court, I'm tired of this nonsense.

dont_thr0w_me_away_

Israelis criticize the goverment all the time, just more between ourselves and less when talking to out of country people.

BlackVirusXD3

Yes, absolutely feeling this way and there are many of us navigating the painful complexity, though our voices aren’t as prominent online as the extremes. Most Jews I know irl feel as we do. This is our humanity, and we have to hold on to it for dear life.

Prudent_Web_3677

I wish there was something we could really do to help.  I don’t think placing blame is most important, and that’s where all the tension and hatred forJews comes from.  We have to work on fixing and helping.

RedFlowerGreenCoffee

There’s no reason for Israel to not get aid to them and anyone in their right mind wants that but it will take a collective effort.

hinaultpunch

The way I view it is that I’m pro-Israel anti-Bibi. The way this was has been prosecuted is to keep him in power and with Trump now back in the White House he’s all onboard with Trump’s insane plan of mass expulsions of Arabs from Gaza so trump and his family can build waterfront resorts on the cheap.

When Israeli soldiers are saying their surperiors are telling them to use live ammunition on unarmed civilians then there is definitely culpability by the some of the top leaders in Israel and it starts with Bibi.

TheInfinityOfThought

The problem is that there is supply but UN is refusing to work with GHF so supplies are piling up. Israel just showed reporters what was happening. The issue isn’t supply but the UN refusing to work unless Hamas gets a cut.

Correct-Effective289

War is hell. Anyone who thinks that a country can fight a perfectly clean war where no civilian is harmed knows nothing about war. By all accounts, this is actually a considerably clean war. 

“War is hell” is not an excuse to target civilians, but rather an acknowledgment that when you are fighting a war in densely populated urban area against an enemy whose strategy is to maximize their own civilian suffering, non-combatants will die. Moreover, this has to be the first war since World War 2 where neighboring countries actively refused to shelter civilians caught in the crossfire, as Egypt and Jordan are refusing to do now. This makes it extremely difficult to move non-combatants away from the battle space. Another first is the outright refusal of the defeated entity (Hamas) to surrender. They are clearly beaten and could end this war tomorrow if they wanted to. 

It’s also worth noting that had Israel started this war, the conversation would be different, but this is a war of necessity — Israel was attacked by Hamas and Hamas must be eliminated.

Individual-Stage-620

I hate to see noncombatants going hungry and suffering as well. I don't see how limiting food aid is a smart or decent way to attack Hamas. 

Has anyone determined how much aid has entered Gaza since Oct 2023 and whether that should have been enough to feed everyone in Gaza? I'm not sure how much of the problem is Israel not allowing enough aid in versus the aid not getting where it needs to be.

Flamingo_Reasonable

The government sucks and the war needs to end. Enough. This is definitely Netanyahu's fault.

However, Israel is now allowing aid to enter Gaza basically freely, which is important to mention. A lot of what you see is indeed propaganda. It would have been better if the incompetent fools in government didn't play right into it. The entire GHF thing was an obvious mistake.

Ahad_Haam

Yeah it’s pretty awful, I’ve had to stop paying attention to it because everything about it is so awful it negatively affecting my mental health.

lordbuckethethird

A lot of people base their views on this conflict (both the current Gaza war and the longer conflict since 1948) on their identity as a Zionist/antizionist or “pro-Israel/pro-palestine” instead of trying understand how individuals are harmed. I don’t really care if people are Zionists or antizionists but I’m not interested in talking to people who believe that the entire population of Gaza is deserving of starvation or forced displacements. Ethnic cleansing is disgusting and needs to be condemned forcefully.

Good-Concentrate-260

It is wearing on all of us. It’s time to end this.  I defended every more  Netanyahu for well over the first year. I don’t understand how shooting at starving civilians is supposed the make Israel safer.

Interesting_Claim414

Oh I definitely feel this way, and will be downvoted into oblivion now for saying that.  But I am having a hard time with the idea that the whole population should be paying the price for what the governing body did , we have other examples of the government doing atrocious things (looking at you , Russia, Trump administration) but yet there are very few people saying: oh yes you elected that and advocating for collateral damage. Bibi now is ensuring that there will three more generations of Palestinians and people around the world that will hate Israelis and all Jews. And no matter how great IDF is they are not saints , not perfect and unlikely winning this war. 
Oh and the war is hard and oh well what about Egypt crowd is normally posting from places nowhere remotely close to any conflicts or wars; most of them really don’t know what they are talking about.

Sababa180

Israel is not alone. The UN, putting Hamas political ambitions first, is at least complicit, probably more.

Puzzleheaded-Test218

The food is already in Gaza.  The UN refuses to distribute it. 

Suitable_Vehicle9960

Is this a good faith discussion? Read the news, please, prior to ranting online. YNetNews is a noted centrist/moderate/objective news outlet. It is NOT The Times of Israel, nor is it Haaretz. It's fair. Egypt is sealed and the world is not blaming THEM for not feeding Gazans, and Israel is TRYING to feed them. 

# [Israel blames UN for Gaza food shortage, 800 truckloads of aid wait for UN delivery](https://www.ynetnews.com/article/h1rfmmgpge)

QueenLevine

I feel sorry for them.  I don’t feel guilty.  That’s the difference.

BurnThis2

What is happening is the fault of Hamas, the UN, Israel, and gullible westerners. It’s horrible and not okay. I can’t control any of them and feel helpless. I want the hostages safe. I want Hamas gone. I want two states and peace. Nobody cares what I want though

Bakingsquared80

The international community only cares because Israel is a sensational topic. Most Americans don’t care at all that millions of Iraqis died in the wars America fought but they suddenly care that some Gazans are dying. It’s literally just because anti-semitism is how you get views and clicks.

Round-Status-5773

Return the hostages and stop trying to kill all Jews.

Next question?

shragae

It's a war. There's a reason people say war is hell. And this is a war in a densely populated urban area in which one side is seeking to maximize casualties amongst its own civilian population. Understand that every image you see -- and they are horrific -- is exactly what Hamas wants. Also understand that there is extreme media bias against Israel. They are not giving you the full story, like the fact that Hamas actively prevents Gazans from getting aid or the fact that there are many tons of it waiting to be distributed. 


Israel is a country, flawed like any other. They're certainly far from perfect. But there are probably dozens of other horrors taking place all over the world right now. Why is it that people are so obsessed with this one conflict? Why does no one care about Sudan, for example, or the ongoing slaughter of Druze in Syria (who Israel tried to help, by the way)? 


You already know the answer to these questions. 

DoodleBug179

I hate to say this after your post, but Hamas really is to blame, both for the Blood Libels they spread and for the misery they spread.  To be upset is a normal,  Jewish response, but the only party to be upset with is Hamas.

LanceJade

Please remember that Palestinians have a whole industry of fabricating misinformation (Paliwood is real). The pictures you see of the starving children have proven again and again to be from Yemen/Syria, AI or even staged using terminally ill patients. In many cases, the "child" is already swaddled to the point that no one can see that it's actually a doll. 


Ask yourself why the "famine" is suddenly worse now that the UN/Hamas no longer has monopoly, especially when we've seen and heard from Gazans themselves that they can finally get aid without having to pay for it. The weaker Hamas gets the worse the reports of Gaza's "suffering". This is more than just a coincidence - the propaganda is turned up to max using the oldest blood libel of them all: bloodthirsty Jews killing innocent babies. If anything, they are getting desperate.


Yes, there us hardship and civilians are always the ones to suffer in war. The task of providing aid to large crowds with Hamas operatives swarming about is a logistical nightmare and there will be shortages until the network has been properly established. It is important to remember, however, that neither the IDF or the GHF are claiming famine and the data does not support that there is ongoing famine. 


It is important that we keep level-headed and rational so we do not fall for the propaganda. The world was always turned against us and we should not rely on the words of antisemites. 

Sad_Eagle8690

Many of those images you seeing are from Yemen, syria, or just staged.

watch sahartv or any of the other myriad of smaller channels. you can see there is definitive exaggeration that looks terrible but you need the context

i mean yes war is awful. yes people are struggling. but Gaza has restaurants. food (though admittedly diverted via Hamas, etc). yes people have died (though 98% of the population is still alive and well)

but watch sahar. this clip, he collected video from people who filmed CNN filming what they wanted the world to see from there. there are definitely staged clips that you're seeing. there's a clip of a kid to be so hungry he's eating sand but there's restaurants right behind him just out of the CNN footage. supposedly a baby that was born on a pile of rubble but the baby is totally clean and they're saying it's 2 hours old but I can assure we tell you that baby's far older than 2 hours. and look at the clothes, they are not close that anyone would find if it was as bad and devastated as they're saying it is 

popular media is showing what they want you to see, not necessarily the whole picture

https://youtu.be/s49D33DPo8I?si=QaQm78yZAIKimdgU

Ifawumi

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migoodman

If you had access to live-streamed coverage of Berlin during WW2 you would have been equally appalled. War is disgusting, and anyone that advocates or encourages is it wrong in the head. Hamas chose this war and refuses to surrender because western college students have glorified and encouraged their violence. Just all around a shitty situation.

TheForsaken69

How about we do some research and talk about facts and not propaganda designed to spread lies and twist the narrative.

Here is a detailed analysis of what is really happening.  Once people address the facts maybe then they can start blaming Israel for something.  But OP and others chiming in have skipped over all the relevant issues, like how Israel does deliver aid, how the UM refuses to cooperate or allow Israel to escort the aid under guard inside Gaza, or how Hamas steals the aid, or how GHF is trying to go around Hamas but the UN is trying to stop GUF from doing that.  

https://www.np.reddit.com/r/BeneiYisraelNews/s/PJIef6wSHu

Asphodelmercenary

I think the issue is people putting the blame entirely on Israel, which seems to be the case for 90% of these propaganda inducing posts. Yes it’s sad, but it’s inevitable.

Mindless_Charity_395

Think back to WWII. All those people starving in concentration camps in Germany. Not just Jews, other people too. 

Did Americans and Europeans "placed blame" or "acknowledged magnitude" for that? Do you think they should have?

  
Also, in the case of Gaza. The photos are children with mostly congenital diseases that cause wasting, atrophy. Yes they need better medical care. But they are not "starving."

TopSecretAlternateID

This is a TROLL. It’s disgusting how they are inundating these groups but you can easily see what they e posted about. The fact that this troll never postedONCE about anything Jewish let alone Gaza says it all.

yumyum_cat

Israel looks bad by allowing the starving of so many women and children, so politically, it would be in their best interest to get food and medical aid to the people of Gaza, even if it's not Israel's responsibility. 

Of course, the rest of the world could figure out a way to get food to Gazans if they really wanted to.

FreeRangeGrape

Imagine if we had todays media during WW2. We could not blame any one nation for the starvation and difficult circumstances war creates globally. Israel is held to a standard no other nation on Earth is expected to adhere to. Not to mention there are two sides to every story. The population in Gaza was not "well fed" under HAMAS before the war either so these conditions hit even harder.

No_Mathematician7395

You should write or ghost-write an article for The New Yorker, or The Atlantic, or any major publication that would agree to publish it, about the reality of the Arab world.

i wish everyone would read the graphic novel The Arab of the Future.  Been there, lived it, totally on target.

snowplowmom

OP join us at OLAM, a network for Jewish humanitarian aid workers. You aren’t alone in this situation. https://www.olamtogether.org/

EDIT: I’m a member. Joined after I was forced to resign from a senior leadership role in the development sector due to post-7/10 Jew hate. This group honestly saved me. I was so disillusioned and shamed for my career path, left alone and confused. Came here and so much clicked. Melding my identities, Jewish and professional in a way that got lost (rather was forced to stay hidden). I’m a little obsessed with this group and truly can’t say enough about their work and network.

melting-lychee

You are not a fuckwit. You embody what a vast majority of Jews are all about: Making the world better for everyone, and peace. 

I try to tell people that they don’t understand who we are dealing with and that antisemitism is rampant in all of the places that should embody humanitarianism. Most don’t believe me or understand. Reality is so messed up that it’s quite simply unbelievable. I’m sorry you had to learn this in person and in such a traumatic way. You’re at home here (and in Israel FYI). Nobody could ever take that away from you.

gettheboom

&gt;or if I even deserve to get better.

Of course you do. 

&gt; I don’t believe in god anymore, 

That's ok

&gt;and I have a really bad trauma response if I try to go to any Jewish cultural space.

I don't know if you feel guilt or shame &amp; that's what prevents you, but don't let hypocrisy or antisemitism steal your identity from you, that's how it wins. I hope you can find a trauma-informed therapist with a background in antisemitism to work through this. The people most likely to support you &amp; understand this are going to be found in Jewish spaces, so don't deny yourself that.

ErnestBatchelder

Israel saved Yahya Sinwar. There are still groups of Israelis working to get Palestinians to hospitals, even after all this. You have been deeply betrayed by people and ideals you trusted - of course your foundations are shaken. Of course you are struggling. But through it and despite it, you did not forget who you are and who we are. You remembered that to save a life is among the highest good you can do, and you remembered it twice: once to help those suffering even when it was deeply hard, and once to save yourself when you knew you could not live this way anymore. Pirkei Avot reminds us that we both cannot refuse to do the work of healing the world and that we cannot finish it on our own, and you have remembered that. Yasher koach, achoti - what strength and bravery that is, sister. You've done nothing to require shame or absolution, not at all. I hope deeply that you are getting, or at least seeking, the support you need. 

I know you are struggling with Jewish spaces, but if you think it could help, I wonder if it would be worth it to visit a mikvah. It is a space of transition and purification, and if you are feeling this kind of ache and stain, it may help you to step into that space. There are egalitarian mikvaot all kinds of places if that would appeal to you. 

Shabbat shalom. Truly. Try to find some peace today. You are doing okay, and you're not alone.

sweet_crab

You are absolutely not a fuckwit and I can't tell you how incredibly strong you are. You endured so much hate from your colleagues in the name of helping the civilians who have been caught in the crossfire of this devastating war. You are not wrong for going and are not wrong for leaving. 


Someone suggested to you write an anonymous article or op-ed about your experience and I absolutely concur. I, like many people, would love to donate money to feed the very people you tried to help, but not if that money will go to an organization that will allow its Jewish colleagues to endure such hate. It would be good for people to know where their money is actually going.


If anyone is a true humanitarian, *it is you*. You went to help people because you genuinely believed in protecting them, even if they did not feel the same towards you. Your colleagues, on the other hand, are despicable. Hatred of any kind has no place in that kind of work. Humanitarian work is not transactional or conditional and their behavior is appalling. I'd hate to find out how'd they'd treat Zionist refugees. 


I'm really sorry you're going through this. PTSD is common among humanitarian workers and I hope you can find help. I'm glad you're doing better in Ukraine, those people need you too. And if you feel like you need a break from it all, please don't hesitate to take one.

Electrical_Pomelo556

Hi, I work in Middle East policy and I also a former journalist - if you ever decide to write something about this and want help writing or editing, please get in touch.

ksalana

Your experience proves that no Jew will ever be “Pro-Palestine” enough for antisemites. You literally provided humanitarian aid to Gazans and it still wasn’t enough.

ThoughtsAndBears342

I'm so sorry. You're not stupid, just, and I mean this in love, naive. Or were. Most of us were and those who weren't were labeled as Islamaohobic or worse. I hope you find healing and hope

DadSouls83

I don’t know if this is unpopular or not, but I’ll say it anyway: Gazan civilians deserve humanitarian aid. No one sane argues that. But they also have a government that failed them catastrophically. The second that aid gets hijacked to glorify terrorism, fund Hamas, or become a propaganda tool, it stops being humanitarian and becomes complicity.

You went in with integrity and compassion. What you endured was inexcusable: open antisemitism, exclusion, gaslighting, and betrayal from people who claim to stand for human rights. They failed every moral and ethical standard. That wasn’t “anti-Zionism.” That was raw, ugly antisemitism. And it thrives in exactly the spaces that pretend to be “progressive.”

I say this as someone who’s been a progressive Democrat my entire life until October 7 shattered my faith in what that label has come to mean.

You did the right thing. They didn’t. You have nothing to be ashamed of. They should be ashamed.

pr0tag

wow i’m so sorry. you should really consider contacting someone to write or speak about your experience, if you feel comfortable. I’m sure there are anonymous routes you could go as well. again, if you’re comfortable. 

this is disgusting behavior and shows a culture of antisemitism and virulent jew hatred. i’m so so sorry you had to deal with this amount of hatred. it’s appalling and disgusting.

avidreader2004

Isn’t it fascinating that the people who truly care about neutrality are Jews?

I’m Zionist. I want two states. I want peace.

Menemsha4

You were duped. It's ok.  You still have the right to be Jewish, ESPECIALLY because you learned from your experience.  You have really valuable information to share with there rest of us.  I'm so sorry you went through this. Therapy might be helpful, but please find a pro-Israel therapist, so you don't get any more hate!

HeyyyyMandy

You’ve received a lot of responses with advice and opinions. I hope you find them helpful. 

All I want to say is: what you experienced was fucked up. I’m sorry this was done to you.

Am-Yisrael-Chai

I am so sorry you have been hit this hard. I have seen many Jewish influencers posting about mental health support catered to Jews post 7/10. I understand you have ptsd and don’t want to engage with jewish spaces, but be careful who you are seeking mental health care from, I would recommend a Jewish practitioner to avoid encountering antisemitism in such a delicate matter.

Could it be of any help to contact Jews in your field and hearing about their coping mechanisms?

a_guenda

I acknowledge the strong humanitarian drive in you. I think it's fantastic what you do. For sure your actions will help peace in what ever small way. 

I am glad you got to have that experience in Jordan. It cannot be easy, having to hide who you are (and here I'm thinking back to when I was in the closet as a teenager-omg the tension), and I'm glad you are in a much better place.  
  
It's certainly opened your eyes. And it's understandable that you wouldn't feel like being in Jewish spaces following such an experience; 'I get this for being Jewish so it would be better to ramp it down'. 

I would suggest that perhaps you could see if you can go to synagogue. For sure that will affirm your identity. You don't have to believe in HaShem, but being around other Jews is going to help you. 

I wish you all power, and I wish you safety.

DandyHorseRider

jtal888

I’m so sorry this happened to you. I also have PTSD from 10/7 and I started EMDR therapy to process my trauma. It has helped so much. I urge you to seek a trauma therapist so you can start healing. You’re not alone, you have a whole community of people, the Jewish connection is so strong. We are all brothers and sisters and we are in this together. 

&gt; I was super naive, and I feel like I helped people who only ever wished me harm. 

At least you're lucky enough to realize this and get out. Some don't realize this until people they were trying to help are cutting their throat.

MedvedTrader

I work in for a humanitarian organization in the US. I have felt extremely torn with the conflict there. You went in with an intention of neutrality and did what you needed to do. Do not blame, feel guilty or call yourself terrible things. You were there on the ground and I can guarantee made a difference for those struggling. Thank you for your service and please consider prioritizing your own mental health. I have dealt with many people, even within my own jewish community that have been quick to blame the humanitarian organizations involved on the ground there without considering the well intentioned people on the ground doing the work you did.

Axe_Em_ERock

I totally feel this. I didn’t work in the humanitarian sector, but I was in a lot of very deeply left progressive circles and it took less than 24 hours for them to show me that all of the work I had done with them would never be reciprocated in any way had I ever needed it- even though I did and still I truly believe in equality for all different types of people from all walks of life, races, colors, religions, sexual orientations and gender identities….because I was a Jew. I echo the sentiments of some others here who say please do not deny yourself the support you need and deserve because you feel uncomfortable for whatever reason  to walk inside a synagogue. Maybe a synagogue isn’t the right venue and that’s okay. Before October 7, I would’ve called myself a progressive secular American Jew. Now I’m an American Zionist Jew who is loud and proud about it. I refused to hide and the only way I’m able to do it is through the support of some amazing people that I found online on Jinstagram believe it or not. A Jewish therapist would probably be helpful as well. I can find you the link to that if you want you can PM me sending you lots of love. You did nothing wrong.

Next_Alarm2427

&gt;  don’t believe in god anymore, and I have a really bad trauma response if I try to go to any Jewish cultural space. I couldn’t imagine trying to go to a synagogue. 

I really very rarely would suggest people go to therapy but in your case: yes. Find a NON-PROGRESSIVE, preferably Jewish, who knows, maybe even a frum, psychologist, and talk it out. Make ABSOLUTELY sure, before you go, that they are not into progressive and "I can criticize Israel if I want to" causes. That's not for you right now.

You became a lot less naïve and a lot more in touch with the real world. You are Jewish and that brought you a lot of unpleasant experiences, as it did for most Jews over the course of history. The important outcome is what are you going to make of it. One option is to hide your Jewishness, stop living a Jewish life, like many Jews did after catastrophes. The other option is to rethink your worldview, overcome the trauma, set your priorities straight and live your life as a proud, dedicated and strong Jew.

intercptr

In Jordan?  Yeah it's just openly Antisemitic and proud of it.

bakochba

I’m sorry. It’s sad, but I think you found that many of these people who consider themselves so PC and kind are really just getting paid in self-righteousness.

TeddingtonMerson

Your feelings are valid. You are not stupid. A version of this has happened to all of us, and to all of my Israeli friends in humanitarian spaces. This is how Amnesty Israel broke away from the international organization. Everything is rotten, everywhere.

thepinkonesoterrify

I am genuinely sorry for what you've experienced. What you experienced is the reality of the middle east, unfortunately. I'm from the MENA region, and honestly antisemitism is the norm here. But that is not because people here are so bad and immoral but because they are fed with continuous extremism (religious and nationalistic) and disinformation from a very, very young age. You are good at heart, and it's better for you to direct your humanitarian work to Ukraine. Stay safe and continue your fantastic work and personality.

2ndr0

Hi, I’m Ukrainian. Thank you for helping Ukraine. We have one of the largest Jewish communities in Europe. I’m not Jewish, just lurking. I think you’d do good with a therapist :)

AnnaBananna3

Your heart is in the right place, so don’t feel guilty for trying to do what is right.

HungryDepth5918

Hi, a Jew from Ukraine here! Thank you very much for joining the Ukraine response! My parents are in Kharkiv. And no doubt you see, hiw many Jews there still are in Ukraine! 
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU

Charkiw1654

Definitely write about your experiences and send them to the Jerusalem post so it gets printed

EditorPrize6818

My heart goes out to you. I imagine you chose this line of work as you have a big heart. Tikkun olam is a guiding principle for us. 
Sounds like you need some healing - therapy, somatic or what not. 
I do recommend using this experience for awareness and exposing the hate that’s happening is so key to change. Please speak out, even if it’s anonymously. 
Sending you all the love - am Israel chai and slava Ukraine.

rosaluxx311

You’ve done your part and have no obligation to ever serve in a hostile environment again. You’re allowed to invest your time and energy in saving yourself rather than strangers. You’re allowed to find a new path for your life’s work that that will nurture instead of break your spirit.

DiotimaJones

LightFlaky2329

Jews will always be treated as the asterisk, as the exception not the rule (in a bad way), and unwelcome by other in-groups. Antisemitism is so ingrained in people’s DNA it is hard for us to truly eradicate it. Try to see that all as objective fact that you needed to learn to truly protect yourself. Your experiences sound truly terrible, but if you are looking for any kind of silver lining, it is good to lose the naivety in a way that you could safely extricate yourself from that dangerous situation. You haven’t lost the heart of Jewish values as you still are working on tikkun olam. You just redirected it to people worthy of your hard efforts, who value all of who you are and not just what they could try out of you.

Shanninator20

Holy shit!  You are an amazing person.  Most people would not have attempted working within such a hostile space.  You showed great love and compassion in how u handled yourself there.  I think, too, that you need to balance your humanitarianism with some selfishness.  It was good that you left and are caring for yourself now.  Please give yourself the empathy u give to others

Anders676

I feel the pain You are a good person, a solid Jew. Good people are bothered by the shitty fucked up world, they judge their behavior and fear that they are contributing to the wrong cause, and bad people don't, it's that simple.
Find a Jewish psychiatrist or therapist to talk through all these, that would be my suggestion for talking care yourself. They may give you medications, just take it, for keeping yourself together, or just for a good sleep.

kittielisA

You are a giant of a person, a true mensch, and what happened to you was so deeply wrong. I'm glad you got out of there and into a more meaningful situation and wish I could send you a few dozen cookies or something to bring a little light into your day. You deserve only good things.

spring13

If you need a social justice oriented Jewish friend, hi! I would love to be friends.

I’m sorry you had this experience.

sarahkazz

Sorry this happened to you OP. What upsets me most is walking down my Safe city and seeing signs and Protests all supporting Gaza not knowing exactly what the situation is like.  At this point I’m convinced 90% of the Protesters are doing it for something to do and parroting the current Fad.

Oscarwilder123

mysteriouschi

If you want to talk about whatever DM me.

-drunk_russian-

I'm so sorry you had to endure that abuse and hatred. I'm also sorry that you had your belief system shattered.

# Yes, you deserve to heal. You are a good person who was maybe a little naive, but that doesn't change the good and decency in your character.

There are many Jewish organizations that could use your skills and compassionate heart, and wouldn't destroy your insides like that. You would be loved and appreciated if you applied all of that to a Jewish organization in need

UnicornStudRainbow

Brave_World2728

I'm very moved by your story and relate in many ways. I'm a traditional French Jew who made Aliyah. I'm half Ashke (Polish Shoah survivor grandchild) and half Sepha (Algerian), so I got double guilt-tripped for not eating my gefilte fish and for not finishing the sixth platter of it at the Shabbat seder.

Jokes aside, I grew up in the public system in one of the toughest cities in France (places called "ghettos," though not in the Jewish sense; it was 10% Christian and 90% Muslim). I experienced **everyday** antisemitism, violent and constant from a young age. I had to hide and lie about my name to survive. I heard antisemitism and terrorism apologies everywhere: school, work, the gym... grocery stores, you name it.

I **HATED** being Jewish.  
I built walls and became paranoid and, toward the end of my nihilistic path, I even avoided Jews or Jewish spaces,  as you call them, to not be a target of more violence. I was scared of being "discovered" or becoming a victim of attacks, which happened often enough around. I developed a deep distrust of non-Jews or, at the very least, stayed on high alert for any shift in behavior.

Long story short (I promise it's not just about me; I’m making a point): I healed and overcame many of my dilemmas and PTSD, but not alone. And you're not alone in your feelings!

I don't have real advice on the path you should take (and I feel others have been way more eloquent here already), but I've never felt as good and free of that weight as when I spent time with fellow Jews. I started small, friends' places, maybe a Shabbat here and there with small groups, nothing religious, just no-pressure time with (our) people. I reached out to traditional orgs and went to their events (parties, concerts, fundraisers etc). Honestly, I probably needed a therapist too lol! but I just wanted to feel safe—not scared of others, of who I am, or of revealing my inescapable identity.

I hope you can start small and find support from those who are here to lift you up around you, the same way you showed unconditional support for others. One step at a time, and the weight should ease a little more each time.

Honestly, I thought Judaism was only negative, but now I **KNOW** it's only negative plus one good thing: at least we have each other, and it always feels good when we are together.

Thank you for being part of us. Much heartfelt love to you, and godspeed in your recovery.

SexTomate

I would love to chat with you about this. I work for a nonprofit that works in Israel and we oftentimes bring in speakers with stories like yours. Would really love to gain more insight from you 🤍

chitlvlou_84

I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this. 

The work you did was an unambiguously good thing. Getting out of there was also a good thing. 

You deserve to get better. 

You are a very good person. 

And if you’re open to it, I highly recommend reaching out to some publications to share your story. It is an important one, and a fascinating one. I think it would be good for people to hear it.

jwrose

You didn’t do anything wrong. You have nothing to feel guilty for or ashamed about. Trauma brain falsely turns your justified shock and anger for how you were treated inward. It victim shames and victim blames. You are that victim. Be proud that you went to the region and helped. Be proud that you’ve chosen a career doing this type of necessary and important work. Thank you for doing it.

ShmaryaR

Your heart is beautiful and you are kind; it is in jewish nature to want to help people and so it is admirable that you have moved over to the Ukraine response. That is huge - i just want to give you gentle holding and let you know your emotions are valid. 

Maybe it is time for more self-care - you are working in another trauma-zone and maybe that is going to exacerbate your PTSD and maybe you deserve some gentle time by the seaside for some days or weeks or months. 

take care and big hugs.

Recent-Base2830

I full hardly believe that hamas attacked Israel expecting the response they received. They want to take over the world, and unfortunately they are succeeding. Too many people believe their lies, and won't even take 2 minutes to learn the actual truth. I'm in Canada, and can't believe people voted in an antisemitic party. Canada will go down like the titanic if something isn't done. Many other countries are in similar boats, or already over taken. Be strong, don't even think about those antisemitic brainless zombies(my word for all the Palestinian supporters). I do recommend going to Israel, although I personally haven't been they are very welcoming, and will treat you with respect. Hugs I wish you the best of luck.

LowTutor2184

How awful. I'm so sorry that you had to go through all that.

Efficient-Being855

It’s important to seek out support, and likely that needs to come in the form of therapy by someone who understands the conflict and the Jewish plight, if you’re not already in it. Speaking personally, it’s really helpful.

Careful_College_2238

Humanitarian aid never gave shit about Jewish lives. The red cross confirmed Auschwitz was fine. When the British starved the survivors to not let them get to Israel, it was fine. When an entire generation of posttraumatic Israelis grew here, no one gave a damn. My grandpa has a story himself from 1939 when a Nazi soldier was the one to force the red cross to treat him, but tbf no one involved knew he was jewish. Being a care provider doean't necessarily mean you care

Quadruple_A1994

Just writing to send you a hug and lots of love. ❤️
I understand the trauma, but maybe trying to get back in touch with your people can help you. Together we are stronger.
I wish you the best in getting through this shock and being able to surround yourself with good people. A big hug 💕

shushi77

The ongoing conflict in Gaza has escalated, resulting in significant civilian casualties and a humanitarian disaster.

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